A Pub Landlord’s Typical Working Week

This list came out of a focus group session we recently ran with experienced pub landlords. The task: ‘List a typical week and some of the days in the life of a devoted Publican’.

1. Work out the staff rota
2. Complete the wages sheet
3. Fill in the tax forms
4. Fill in the NI forms
5. Fill the wages packets
6. Put advert in for new bar staff
7. Put advert in for new kitchen staff
8. Replenish all cherries/cocktail sticks, etc
9. Replenish all crisps/nuts, etc
10. Check AWP machines/empty/replenish
11. Let in food delivery/check temperatures etc
12. Visit cash-and-carry, for supplies
13. Light the fire
14. Check merchandising messages
15. Check Garden for mess, clean up
16. Get Menu ready or agreed with Chef
17. Let in wine and spirit delivery
18. Let in soft drink delivery
19. See BDM for meeting
20. Take innumerable telephone calls/bookings, etc
21. Meet bank manager/accountant/VAT person
22. Let in ‘guest ale’ delivery
23. See 12 different reps a day!!
24. Let in bar staff (if they turn up!!)
25. OPEN THE PUB (BY NOW IT IS 11.00AM)
26. Wait for customers
27. Start serving customers
28. Check Fax orders for food
29. Sort out regular issues in the toilets
30. Take 20 telephone calls an hour
31. Panic if the Chef throws a wobbly
32. Ask ‘Fred’ to stop flicking his ash on the carpet
33. Change kegs/casks as they run out
34. Deal with unexpected visit from the EHO officer
35. Go to the bank pay in/get change
36. Deal with customer complaint about the sausages
37. Talk to the Chef (carefully)
38. Arrange matches for Darts/Quiz/Skittles, etc
39. Prepare for a forthcoming rent review
40. Make insurance claim for anything you can
41. Deal with leak in the cellar/roof/bathroom
42. Handle flack from customers when the price of beer increases
43. Comply with all regulations at all times
44. Stop a fight in the bar
45. Try and understand some new legal guidelines
46. Tell a telephone caller a white lie!
47. Refuse a customer with a dog in the dining room
48. Clean up the sick in the toilet
49. Check the weekly stock-take results, panic if there is a short-fall, get the staff together and tell them “someone is fiddling” (carefully)
50. Stop 6 of the lads arguing over the pool table
51. Comfort Fred and Mary who are drowning their sorrows in gin and tonics over the loss of their budgie
52. Deal with 6 different charities who want you to collect money for them
53. Deal with PRS and PPL representatives
54. Argue with SKY over the licence costs
55. Worry if takings are too low
56. Clean up some more sick
57. Visit your competitors and see how they do it better
58. Work out plans to grow the business
59. Try and figure out the mechanics of the latest promotion the brewery want you to run
60. Buy 10 dozen new glasses to replace broken ones
61. Constantly go ‘the other side of the bar’ to converse with customers and monitor ‘naughties’
62. Constantly clean up after customers leave
63. Call time at 11.00 pm
64. Finally plan to put your feet up for a night-cap
65. Deal with those who want a bit of ‘afters’
66. Repeatedly ask them to leave the premises without loosing your temper
67. AND ABOUT MIDNIGHT … GO TO BED !!

Hey, don’t shoot the messenger!